Can We Stop with the Promposals?

Gavin shares his thoughts on the "Promposal"

As Spring springs into full-Springness, that means it is time for high school kids everywhere to get excited (and ultimately let down) by Prom! It's that teenage right of passage that has inspired countless movies based on how important having the perfect prom night  is. A few years ago, movies and reality collided and the idea of a "Promposal" was formed.

This is definitely about sex.

A "Promposal" is the act of elaborately asking someone to prom in ways that can be described as "epic," "romantic," or "OH MY GOD, THAT'S GONNA GO VIRAL!" The Promposal usually involves some sort of pun and definitely involves a poster board.

Promposal's make up 95% of poster board sales from Feb-Apr (according to a stat I just made up)

My issue with the Promposal doesn't have to do with the creativity or effort that goes into them, but rather that creativity and effort HAVE to go into them. Everyone is trying to outdo everyone with the best Promposal and it acts as yet another way for teens to compare themselves to an imaginary standard. If you want that girl or guy to go to prom with you, you better have a damn good Promposal to show what a Big Swingin' D you are or else you won't ever amount to anything.

You might not want the word "late" involved with your Promposal though...

I just believe there are more important things to focus on. I know when you're in high school, it seems like it is going to last forever and that you are going to marry the girl from AP Lit, but you probably won't. The only upside to going all out for a promposal is that you can look back years from now and think "What was I thinking becoming a train conductor just so I could tell I girl that I Choo-Choo-Choose her like The Simpsons episode?!" It seems like a massive waste of time. And I'm not so Grinch-hearted that I haven't seen some pretty adorable Promposals.

But the ones I have seen have been for people that I have friendships with. I think it's more the idea of seeing them happy as opposed to their elaborate prom garbage. Everything doesn't need to be a production for Twitter or Facebook or Snapchat. I've even heard that some parents hire professional photographers for the Promposal. That is insane. I have friends with professional cameras and wouldn't think to ask them to take my picture holding up a poster board with some super bad pun.

Especially if you don't know how to use a ****ing comma

 When you start making a production out of everything, you put a lot of pressure on the person being asked. No girl or guy wants to say no when the paparazzi jump out of the bushes to capture every moment, even if they don't want to go with that person. That's not fair either. It also sets unrealistic expectations of what future relationships might be. And it also might make your actual marriage proposal a huge let down.

"Sure, I'll marry you but my high school BF used more Kanye puns"

 My advice (as a 30 year old man who has no concept of what is cool or acceptable anymore and who is listening to Emo music while writing this) is to just ask someone to prom the old fashioned way. Just ask. No production, no fan fare. Just ask them. And if they say no, then it's OK to lock yourself in your room and cry forever. But at least you won't have anyone recording it. Happy Prom season everyone!