Kentucky Mom Shares Hilarious Photos of Her “Exorcist” Possessed Children
Have you ever taken a photo of your child, looked at it and thought, "Oh my Lord! My kid looks possessed?" My dear friend and cohost, Angel Welsh, certainly has. And, look. I have been around her two youngest children for years now and I have seem them in action. There's a strong possibility they are possessed. I mean, look at kid up there. She's turned into this . . .
Drew Barrymore in Firestarter, anyone?
I mean, I have seen that child (Charlotte's her name, though you may not want to say it five times while looking in a mirror) lay down in the middle of 2nd Street in downtown Owensboro during the International Bar-B-Q Festival. I have forgotten what caused her epic meltdown that day, but she dramatically fell into the street and started writhing like her soul had been taken over by Pazuzu.
If you know anything about Owensboro's BBQ Fest, you know that the highlight of it is the legion of Catholic church cooking teams that cook up pork and chicken and burgoo. However, when the Catholics witness your daughter have a meltdown then start grabbing their phones to speed dial their priests, you know there's a problem.
I mean, look at this kid. I'm pretty sure this photo was taken just moments after she broke free her wrist restraints and said some really unfortunate things about Father Karras' mom and how she passes her time in Hell.
And I realize the younger horror movie fans don't really understand how defining a horror film The Exorcist was. If you fall into that younger demographic, here's a comparison you'll appreciate. I'm certain you've heard of that creepy doll Annabelle.
Annabelle's got nothing on this . . .
I mean, if that kid was a porcelain doll, I would ship her off to The Toyminator at Consumer Mall faster than you can say "The Bride of Chucky."
But in truth, Angel doesn't have just one possessed kid. She's got two.
Allow me to introduce you to Tucker. To do that, we go back to The Exorcist.
One of the most classic scenes in that movie is the scene in which Father Karras is talking to the devil inside Regan and challenging his identity and power. Karras is basically calling his bluff. You know that scene? It's the notorious "pea soup" vomit scene.
To no one's surprise, one of Angel's children has looked just like this! I mentioned little Tucker. Here he is moments after barfing up pea soup.
And if you need more proof that she's got a little "Damien" on her hands, here's Exhibit B.
It's no wonder Angel thinks that Poltergeist is the scariest movie ever made. She's basically living in that house. She needs to get a bundle of sage the size of Kia Telluride and call that short little weird Poltergeist woman to come over and rid of it demons.