10 Different Food Disasters That Wreck Your Soul Every Time
We all have experienced food disasters. There's always some little mini-disaster that occurs that totally ruins a meal at one time or another in our lives. Today, I'm going to list these little mini-disasters so that you may relive them and cringe at the thought of them happening to you... again.
1) Spilling your alcohol
Party foul! No, but really. Spilling your drink sucks, especially if it's an $8 glass of wine or better yet, a $30 bottle of wine. I've spilled more than one expensive drink and let me tell you...there's nothing more gut-wrenching than watching your money splash into a puddle on a dirty bar floor while intoxicated.
2) Popped pizza rolls
Anyone who's ever eaten a pizza roll knows the agony of a popped roll. Picture this: you're sitting in the living room watching television when the sweet aroma of toasting pizza rolls wafts against your nostrils. The timer goes off and you excitedly open the toaster oven door to find that every single one of your pizza rolls have popped open and the contents of their little dough stomachs are burned onto the pan. I'm tearing up as I type...
3) Mozz sticks with no mozz
The most disappointing thing when going to a restaurant and ordering mozzarella sticks is getting mozz sticks with no mozz inside! Come on, line cook dude! You had to see that the mozzarella leaked out of the mozz stick, so why are you serving it to me? WHY?
4) Pinterest cooking fails
We've all seen them on the internet and some of us have even made them. You know, when you try really hard to make a unicorn cake with step by step picture-perfect Pinterest photos and you end up with a one-eyed goat wearing a flaccid carrot hat instead? That's a real culinary atrocity. NAILED IT!
5) Pizza topping avalanche
Out of all of the items on this list, I think this one hits home the hardest for me personally. There is no greater love in the world than my love for pizza. So when I see a piping hot pizza fresh out of the oven, it's easily one of the most electrifying moments of my day. My only objective for the foreseeable future is to devour that pie. Then the inevitable happens; I can't wait until it cools a little more - I have to have it now! In having it now, I reach for a slice, pull it to my plate and as I go to insert it into my mouth, all of the toppings abruptly slide into a big goopy mess onto my plate leaving me depressed, empty, and alone, just like everyone else on this God-forsaken twirling rock! *shakes fist at sky*
6) Sneaky foods
Sneaky foods are foods that appear to be one thing when in reality, they're something completely different. Were you expecting a coke and the waitress mistakenly brought you Dr. Pepper? Or have you ever wanted that delicious chocolate chip cookie that turned out to be oatmeal raisin instead? Sneaky foods are the worst, especially fat-free varieties, like fat-free cheese. Cheese IS fat. I refuse to eat this imposter 'cheese'!
7) When you drop your ice cream
This one is a bit of a cliche, but none the less holds true. Not much is more satisfying than getting a nice, grand double scoop of frosty delicious ice-cream on a sweltering summer day. The worst case scenario is the one that we all dread - you go to lick the ice cream and the balance ratio is off and the entire two scoops plop to the pavement below - and people don't understand why kids cry when it happens to them. I'm almost 30 and I'd cry if it happened to me.
8) Deceitful vegetarian meat
I have no issues with vegetarian meats themselves. I only have a problem when someone tells me something is a meat and then I try it and they're like, "Oh it's actually a veggie chicken patty! See? It's good!" It might have been good if you didn't try to trick me but now I do not only hate the veggie chicken but also I don't trust you and we are no longer friends.
9) When your piece of cake topples onto the plate icing first
Often times, mini-disasters like this happen in slow motion. First, you cut the cake. Then, you balance the cake slice on the cake spatula being extra careful to make sure it doesn't topple. Everything is going well - the cake slice is loose from the collective whole and is rising up on the spatula to your plate. You've made it to the plate! Now, easy does it and that cake slice will gently slide onto the plate with ease. Here's where everything goes wrong. You shift the spatula to ease the cake onto the plate when suddenly the cake becomes top heavy and nose dives, icing first, onto your plate. Now, you are left with an upside down cake and a lot of plate scraping to do. Bummer.
10) When the egg yolk breaks
Nothing is more visually displeasing than to watch a perfect egg yolk pop before your eyes. No doubt that everyone has experienced this culinary horror. Everybody knows the story - you go to carefully fold the egg and for some unknown reason, probably an act of God, the yolk suddenly breaks and oozes all across the skillet. No eggs over easy for you!
- When your protein shake won't blend
- When your coffee isn't strong enough
- When someone forgets it's their turn to bring the coffee to work
- When something is supposed to be a dessert but it's made from vegetables and lies
- When it looks delicious but tastes awful
- Bacon bits when the menu says bacon
Do you have any other food disasters that tear you up inside when they happen to you? Let us know!