Tin Fish in Newburgh Not Classy Enough – [Petty Reviews of the Tri-State]
One Evansville resident is classier than the rest of us.
I almost didn't want to do this review. Mostly because there isn't a lot to make fun of (not that that has stopped me before). This review is just more of a reflection of one person's s***ty attitude as opposed to petty. But, hey, it's a slow week so let's get to it. This weeks (non)review is of Tin Fish in Newburgh. As always reviews are 100% real and 100% petty AF.
"Nasty and not very classy" is a pretty aggressive way to start out a review. Also, it's to be noted that this review was posted as a response to someone naively asking "Hey, how's Tin Fish?" The responses were mostly positive but this reviewer kicked down the door of tact like a SWAT team that craves attention. Instead of describing what makes it particularly nasty, they just kind of left it at that. It gives no context. It'd be like if Janet Jackson just one day said "Hey, it's Miss Jackson if you're nasty" without releasing a song called "Miss Jackson..If You're Nasty" that described why she a nasty, nasty girl.
"Just assume I don't wash my hands after I pee..."
If you're playing "Petty Review Bingo" at home, you can mark out "b****ing about the price." I'm not saying people around here can be cheap, but that is exactly what I said in a blog yesterday. I don't know how much food people expect for a certain dollar amount. Do you expect a truck-load of food for $9? Perhaps you'd like to eat the actual shark from JAWS for $2.99? According the Tin Fish menu, you can get a reasonably sized combo that comes with an entree, fries, and slaw for around $12. That's a good amount of food. But I guess they lose points because they serve their food on "paper plates" (even though the photo clearly shows styrofoam). I guess there is some wierd correlation between how much you can charge for food based on what it is served on. Which in this case means that things should be MORE expensive because they aren't reusing dishes and have to keep restocking their supply.
The sequel to Hidden Figures will just be the reviewer solving how much paper plates cost.
I think the reviewer may have also blamed Tin Fish for ruining Christmas but it's tough to tell. Also, if you have the space "We won't be back" on "Petty Review Bingo," congrats! You just won the joy and happiness that this reviewer may never actually achieve.
I don't mean to be petty myself, but I noticed this when I was searching the Tri-State Restaurant Reviews Facebook page:
Now, I was kicked out of this group for doing this column. It would appear that maybe "local radio DJ making jokes" wasn't the only problem they had going on. But hey, like Kermit the Frog sipping tea, that's none of my business...
Sidenote: I tried labeling this week's column a bit different. If that made it more eye-catching, let me know if you'd like it to continue!