The Top 5 Things Guys are Doing Wrong in the DMs
In case you didn't hear on this morning's radio show, I've recently made a "fan" Facebook account. I wanted to do this so I could interact with listeners and get to know everyone a little better. I assumed it would gain some traction over the last few weeks, and it has.
I appreciate all the love and support from everyone, but I've also ran into some, well, creepy messages. Now, I'll give some of these guys the benefit of the doubt. They could just be being friendly or trying to make a new friend. For others, it's pretty clear what they want. I've formulated a mental list of what NOT to do if you're trying to get a girl's attention, and now I'll share it with you. See the following:
1. Don't be so blunt.
While I'm sure some girls are into men who are forthcoming and honest, I really don't think asking someone to literally date you the second you approve their friendship is the right way to go about things. I could be wrong. Get to know them first.
2. "Hi" is creepy.
If you're trying to get to know someone, maybe start off with a question or a compliment. Just saying, "hi", will not likely get you a response from most females. It's boring.
3. Don't thank them for the add.
This is just weird. You don't need to thank someone for adding you. They aren't doing you a favor. They added you because they wanted to, so leave it at that.
4. Don't ask if someone's single or married.
I get why some guys do this...they don't want to engage in a conversation with a girl that's in a relationship or marriage. That's respectable. But asking this right off the bat shows what your intentions are.
5. Lastly, change your profile picture.
No one wants to see your 6-pack or your dog (unless you're in the pic too). I know I'm not going to approve someone who has a straight stomach shot as their profile picture. I mean, get over yourself. It's OK to love yourself, but don't be full of yourself. Show the world your face...it gives you an identity and makes you seem more like a real person.
Now remember, everyone's different and I'm sure there are girls out there who don't mind being approached in one of the ways I mentioned...but I think I can speak for most girls when I say they don't. Just have a natural conversation with someone. Ask them about their interests, hobbies, compliment them, etc.. that's the more gentlemanly thing to do. Social media is already full of enough frauds and creepers that make most people hesitant, so understand why someone might have their guard up.
I don't want this to make people refrain from messaging me or interacting with me. I encourage everyone to comment on my posts and I enjoy having conversations with listeners. I'm always eager to hear what someone thinks about something The Rob and I talked about that day. So, don't take this the wrong way. For almost every creepy comment I've gotten, there's been a compliment, and that's amazing.