River Kitty Cat Cafe – Petty Reviews of the Tri-State

Can a local business that isn't even open yet be the victim of a petty review? Of course it can!

The River Kitty Cat Cafe is coming to Evansville in 2017 and people seem to be really excited. I mean, what's not to love about a cafe that gives you the option to hang out with cats that you can also adopt. However, there are some people that just can't resist being petty, even when a business HASN'T EVEN OPENED YET! As always, reviews (or in this case, "reviews") are 100% real and 100% petty AF.

Yes, that's right, someone took umbrage with the fact that the "River Kitty" is a pun of "River City" and that could somehow siphon business from the River City Mercantile and Coffee Co. across the street. OK, first off, "River Kitty" is an adorable pun and should never change. Second, "River City" is a nickname that is free to be used by anyone. Nobody owns that. I also don't think the Cat Cafe is targeting anyone directly, aside from people who love cats and also love food and drink.

Pictured: The target demo of the River Kitty Cat Cafe...Yeah, it's me...

I highly doubt there will be that much confusion on which business you are seeking. I mean, people seem to manage the dangerous minefield of confusion known as choosing between Papa Murphy's and Papa John's without too much psychological dismay, so I assume it's within reason you can deduce between River City and River Kitty. If you are afraid you can't pull this off (getting all mixed up and such), here are some simple questions to ask yourself when going to one of these Main St businesses:

Question 1: Are there cats available for petting and cuddling at the place I am currently eating/drinking?

If you answered yes, congrats, you are at The River Kitty Cat Cafe! If you answered no, you are literally anywhere that isn't the River Kitty Cat Cafe!

However, we're not including cats that may have wandered into an Olive Garden

END OF QUESTIONS

It's not a hard questionnaire to fill out. People who like cats will go to the cat cafe, and if cats aren't your thing (which baffles me to how that's even an option), you'll probably continue going to wherever you were already going.

Unlike most of the Petty Reviews, the owners of the River Kitty Cat Cafe actually responded to this review in a very professional way:

So yeah, maybe give this new and exciting place a chance before you leave a completely baseless 2 Star review on an upstart business? I cannot wait for the River Kitty Cat Cafe to open and to give them all of my money and give the cats all of my snuggles.