Top 5 Things Your Man Won’t Do on Sunday’s Now That the NFL Lockout is Over – Ryan’s List

By mid-October, the lawn more than likely won't need to be mowed for the remainder of the year (unless we keep getting hit with these torrential rains in the Evansville area, then we may be mowing grass until February). However, even after the mower is put away for the year, there's always outdoor work to be done. Leaves will eventually need to be raked, snow and ice will need to be removed from the sidewalk and/or driveway; there will always be something. And that something will now have to wait until early February before it gets done. Look at it this way, the leaves make a good compost so your man's not refusing to rake them because football is on, he's ensuring a lush, green lawn come spring. That man of yours...always thinking.

Let's be real here, this wouldn't have happened even if the lockout continued. Moving on...

The "Honey-Do List" is about to become the "Honey-It-Ain't-Happening-Until-Football-Season-Is-Over List". However there may be time to get any "in progress" projects into the "finished" column before September 11th with the right kind of "persuasion" (take that however you'd like). As for any future projects you may want to add to the list, forget it. Schedule those to start February 6th (the day after the Super Bowl).

Unless you're wearing a jersey, helmet, and shoulder pads, any words that come from your man's mouth on a Sunday afternoon will not be directed at you. Don't get me wrong, he will speak frequently throughout the day and several of the words he does say may not be suitable for young ears, but every single one of them will be at the players on TV (or computer if he has his fantasy football team page up...and he will). They will either be words of encouragement when his team is within scoring range, or they will be words of anger when someone drops what he perceives to be an easy catch or misses a tackle that results in the other team scoring.

I realize it may be hard to imagine that what you perceive as a "silly sport" would put that thing "two people do when they love each other" on the back burner, but we're talking football here! Football is different because it only happens once a week (or twice when you factor in Monday Night Football, then there's Thursday & Saturday games later in the season, but let's stick with once a week for the purpose of this blog). If your man has a baseball or basketball team he follows, he can see them play up to 3 times a week or more. But with football, regardless of what day his team plays, that's it until the following week. Besides, there's six other days in the week for that other thing.

However if seeing your man sit in a pair of shorts and a t-shirt yelling at the TV gets your juices flowing to the point where you just can't control your urges, you may be able to pull off the fabled "halftime performance". Be warned, the chances of making this work depends greatly on how his team has performed in the first half. If they're winning, you should be good to go. If they're losing, don't bother. His only concern is how quickly they can turn things around in the 2nd half, not how quickly he can turn around your 2nd half.