The semi-finals began last night, and it's off to a STRONG start!  The performances last night were incredible.  Stern was in more of a serious mood than other nights, plus there weren't that many acts to laugh at.  This week I compiled Howard's three funniest lines.


The first two quotes actually came from an act that involved Howard on-stage.  Mentalist Eric Dittleman, or simply "Dittleman" as he's become more popular as, had Howard on stage with him, and had him drawing an illustration of himself and coloring different parts of his face different colors:

“It looks like I threw up on my face!"

After he was impressed by Dittleman's mind reading and trying to figure out he did it:

"Tell everyone how you did it!  Come over here or I'll spank you!"

His last quote that made me LOL was directed at Joe Castillo, the Sand Art Guy.  He was defending himself against criticism that his art was begining to look repetitive.  He told Howard, "I didn't use [create] any animals!":


"You had a bird...  Isn't that an animal?"

The semi-finals continue next week, and I'll take notes on what my favorite judge has to say!