The Pumpkin Spice Craze is Officially Out of Hand [PHOTO]

Congratulations America, your love of pumpkin-spicing all the things has reached a level of absurdity I don't think we can retreat from.

Before I get too deep into what I found at the grocery store recently, allow me to preface the story with the fact that I'm not a Pumpkin Spice person. If you're a frequent reader of my posts, that shouldn't come as a surprise since I apparently don't like anything everyone else loves. The smell is pleasant enough, say in terms of burning a Pumpkin Spice candle, but eating Pumpkin Spice-flavored foods isn't my thing.

Now with that in mind, let's dive into what I saw at the store recently —

What. The. Hell. Is nothing sacred anymore?

Look, I know Cheerios already feature a variety of flavors (Honey Nut Cheerios are "my jam"), so it's not like they're bastardizing a once wholesome slice of Americana, but this is such blatant attempt by a corporation to hop on a over-populated bandwagon, it leaves me shaking my head.

Don't get me wrong, I understand the basic premise of business and capitalism; find something people are into, and give it to them. I'm in the media for the love of all things good and holy, that's essentially our business model.

I just wonder where it ends. Pumpkin Spice scented underwear? Pumpkin Spice flavored antacids?

If you think those ideas sound silly, there are a few crazier than that which already exist. Want your dog to smell like Pumpkin Spice? There's a shampoo for that.

Pumpkin Spice Chicken Sausage? It's a thing.

Tired of your armpits smelling "shower fresh", or like a "Cool Rush" (whatever that means)? How about rubbing some Pumpkin Spice scented deodorant all up in those pits? Because you can.

If we don't watch it, Pumpkin Spice will quickly become an epidemic like meth or heroin. If that happens, I shudder to think of the things people will do to get their fix. It may make what Bob Saget's character in the movie, Half Baked did for cocaine look like child's play. (Warning! Video link contains NSFW language.)