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See Every Chalkboard Quote Written from ‘The Simpsons’

The Simpsons will celebrate their 500th episode tonight on Fox 44 at 7pm. As a tribute to this incredible run, has released a graphic featuring every single chalkboard quote Bart Simpson has written during that run. Fortunately, they’re also freely allowing people to post it on their websites, so you can stay right here to see it! After you push the READ MORE button of course.

I used to be a die hard Simpsons fan. I watched the syndicated episodes that ran at 6 or 6:30 each evening along with any new episode or repeat that aired on Sunday’s. Then I had kids (and at the time no DVR) and I realized The Simpsons wasn’t exactly the best entertainment for their young eyes and minds. I haven’t gone back since. These days I prefer Family Guy as my source for good toilet humor.

If you’re unaware of the gag, part of the theme song that kicks off each weeks episode features Bart staying after school to write a short phrase on the chalkboard as punishment for who-knows-what. The joke is that each week there is a different quote. The end of the song where the family gathers on the couch to watch TV is also different each week.

Before you check out the graphic below, know that there are not 500 quotes, but only 288 (that’s right “only”). A post it note along the side about midway down reveals the fact that the show often repeats quotes.

Some of my personal favorites are:

“I did not see the teacher applying for welfare”

“Five days is not too long to wait for a gun”

“I will not mock Mrs. Dumbface”

And, “Hillbillies are people too”

Bart Simpsons chalkboard graphic

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