Heartbreak for Sale! – The Weird and Worst of Evansville Buy/Sale/Trade

It's been a few weeks since I've compiled a list of weird and terrible things are selling. This week's items start out fairly normal and ultimately ends with some poor dude weeping outside of a girls house (presumably). Let's do this!

Weird: Clothes (AND DON'T WASTE THEIR TIME!)

I've been seeing this trend grow more and more as I've done this column: People insisted that you not WASTE THEIR TIME when buying stuff. I get it; you don't want to get stood up or miss out on potential buyers while messing with someone who isn't serious. But damn, they bolded and capitalized not to waste their time. It's so aggressive. Their time is so valuable, they couldn't be bothered to even make a coherent sentence about what they're selling. Based on the exclamation and question mark after "Prices vary," I have no idea if the prices vary or if the seller even knows. BUT DON'T WASTE THEIR TIME!

Weird: Pineapple Lamp

I love the presentation of this. What are you getting? A lamp. That is shaped like a pineapple. You don't need to write a bunch of sexy copy about this lamp because it sells itself. Do you like your room being illuminated? Hells yeah, you do. Do you like things shaped like fruit, preferably a pineapple? Hell to the yeah. Get $10 and make all of your dreams come true.

Worst: Re-Sold Flowers By Woman Who Clearly is Having None of You

Some guy had these flowers delivered to this lady and her first thought was "I'm gonna sell these." I'm no relationship expert, but having the girl you like sell the flowers you sent her on Facebook might be a red flag that she is not interested at all. Not only is she not interested, she vehemently want's them out ASAP, as she cut the price in HALF! Not only did homeboy pay $70, she is selling them for half the cost. He could have bought the flowers from her and saved $35 (if he could time travel). I've been through some rough break-ups and upsetting relationship situations, but damn, I think everyone is sad now.