And Now, Four Things Everybody Loves That Rob Can’t Stand – Movies Edition
OK, I LOVE movies. Whether DVD, Blu-Ray, or VHS, my apartment is littered with movies. But some of the most successful movie franchises of all time have managed to completely escape me. Here are four movie franchises I’ve never seen a single movie from, and don’t intend to:
STAR WARS: Much like my devoted abhorring of country music, some people absolutely HATE me simply because I have never seen a Star Wars movie! People always try to be “the one” to make me cave, completely convinced I’ll like it… I’m sure I wouldn’t. I don’t like science-fiction. I don’t like aliens. I don’t like spaceships. I don’t like robots. I’m sure Star Wars is a premiere example of fantastic storytelling… I just don’t want to hear it.
LORD OF THE RINGS: A lot of people I respect adore these movies. You can’t argue that they’ve been extremely successful. I even gave the first one a shot… But I just couldn’t finish it. Allow me to continue my list of things I don’t like: Elves… Fairies… Gremlins… Caves. I’m sorry, I wish I could meet you half way on this… But I can’t.
HARRY POTTER: This seems to me like the dorkiest of movies. I know people love all of these movies, and they feel like they’re educated because they read the books too, but these movies seem less desirable than even the first two on my list. Have some more things I don’t want to be exposed to in movies: Other dimensions, witchcraft, cauldrons, spells, and flying broomsticks… I’ll pass.
FAST AND THE FURIOUS: This is a franchise based upon a lifestyle I just wish to stay ignorant towards. Sadly, I’ve met people in real life that remind me of the characters in these movies. Any time I’m around one of those people, I’m always trying to get away from them, I can’t imagine WANTING to see a movie (or SIX) about them. I use my car to get me from point-A to point-B. I actually saw the first one in the theater when it was new and I found it unbearable. Noz, turbo, hydraulics, wife-beaters, oil-slicks, and street-racing round out my list of things that I just don’t want to see in a movie.
OK, go ahead and tell me how wrong I am by leaving me a comment!